When the going gets tough, and people are hurt or angry and carry resentments about not being heard or understood, they often give up and then start down the road to Divorce.
A Couple Specific Intensive Retreat (CSIR) is a retreat where we can spend anywhere from 2 day to 4 days working specifically with a couple around their relationship issues.
This retreat built for two, is devoted to helping you recognize your communication patterns, breaking down the ones that are dysfunctional, and rebuilding the relationship. Each retreat is designed to be specific to the issues and problems that the individual couple is struggling with whether it’s communication, intimacy, family issues, or holding onto resentments.
This Retreat is all about the two of you.
THE FOCUS OF THIS RETREAT IS ABOUT HEALING YOUR RELATIONSHIP
✅ Have a specific issue that needs to be resolved (like struggling with infidelity, work/life balance, communication issues, or commitment struggles.)
✅ They do not have the time to devote to working on their relationship for only 1 hour at a time. Traditional therapy just doesn’t fit their schedule.
✅ They are busy professionals, and it is easier to take a larger chunk of time to devote to their marriage/relationship.
✅ They focus better in an intensive setting where they can devote their time, energy, and resources to the issues at hand.
✅ They prefer to have the option of having their retreat in the privacy of their home or at the The Couples Clinic.
The goal of the Couple Specific Intensive is to allocate a chunk of time to really brainstorming, educating, and healing your relationship. By focusing, strategizing, and digging deep, the hope is to unveil the resentments, recognize the dysfunctional patterns and re-align the relationship so it can continue to grow.
Ronnie meets with only one couple at a time, so they get her complete attention. Opportunities are given to meet individually so that each individual has the space to discuss what is causing them the most stress and pain in this relationship. Then we come together for learning and practice opportunities so that we can begin to repair the relationship.
There are many breakaway sessions where you are going to practice the new skills learned while trying to work through some of the pain, hurt and unresolved grief you may have from this relationship.
We will use deep discussion, videos, exercises, and handouts to support your learning and skill set building.
Typically, we will engage in 6 hours of therapy with a lunch break in between, and we can negotiate so it best accommodates your schedule.
After you’re intensive, we can either continue to do check-ins or I can refer you to a qualified therapist who can continue to support your growth.
Remember in relationships and in marriage we either grow together, or we grow apart. But growth always requires some growing pains and change.
PAIN IS THE PRECURSER TO GROWTH.
After working with thousands of couples, I have discovered very clear patterns that happen that cause dysfunction in most relationships. It often centers around how we deal with emotional pain and complaints. We FIGHT them, or we FLIGHT from them, but we struggle with FACING them.
I teach couples the skill set of how to face pain. I teach couples how to hear and respond to complaints. I teach couples how to recognize what unresolved grief and pain they are holding onto as resentment. I teach couples how to move into forgiveness.
My end goal is to build a framework and help couples acquire a set of communication tools that will help them have regular uncomfortable conversations going forward. That helps them move into compromise and build a “Team Us” mentality.
We do this by learning about what our attachment style is, what our conflict pattern is, and ultimately learning how to have empathy for how our partner has pain and learning how to respond to it.
Thousands of couples have learned these tools and skills. Let’s face it, the vast majority of us come into romantic relationships clueless about conflict. If we didn’t have a great model of a healthy relationship demonstrated to us by our parents, then we come into our relationship with only the tools that we had.
I am here to tell you…there are better tools.
You can learn them.
And I will happily teach them to you.
You can do this. Look at what you have built already! You can absolutely build a better relationship.
These can include:
Each couple is unique and comes with their own issues and own unresolved pain. The reality is that each person’s pain is their pain. And pain is to be respected.
So, it helps to understand what your individual pain is (meaning what issues are causing you conflict) and then helping the two of you build empathy, forgiveness, and compromise around these issues.
*Dinner and accommodations is on your own and we encourage you take advantage of one of Sarnia's many restaurants and hotels- we will provide a list!*
During this 30 minute complimentary and confidential online consultation, we will meet to discuss your relationship, and how a CSIR (couple specific intensive retreat) can benefit you both.
We will go over what the present issues are, what your individual goals are and mutual goals for the retreat.
We will also go over what we cover in the intensive and what is the best time period (2 day, 3 day or 4 day) given our learning goals.
I also want you get a feel for me, and determine if it feels like a good fit and answer any questions you may have about the process or content of the retreat.
Ronnie is available for the weekend to best meet your needs and so that you are not interrupting your work schedule.
Depending on your needs, we can complete the retreat at the Clinic, or in the comfort of your own home, or a mutually agreed upon location.
Do you have coverage for counselling through your work? We can provide you with insurance receipts to cover the cost of your retreat. As this is psychotherapeutic retreat, it may be covered through your insurance. For more information, please call our office at 519-541-9173 as each insurance provider is different, and we will be happy to answer your questions and walk you through how to get the most out of your work benefits!!
Ronnie has been working in the helping field for the last twenty-three years and has worked with thousands of couples. She has extensive experience with issues such as infertility, infidelity, addictions, and mental health struggles.
Growing up, Ronnie had a different start in life than most. She lived in multiple blended families, in multiple different provinces and attended over sixteen schools as a child. Because of this, she was always fascinated with love; what makes it and what breaks it.
As a result, Ronnie spent the vast majority of her career learning and trying to understand attachment and love. Whether her work was in the field of adoption, reunification, or helping couples and families recover from the trauma of abuse, mental health, or addictions, Ronnie has always known her calling in life was to help others learn how to love one another, and most important... love themselves.
She has been trained in the PREP Method(Prevention and Relationship Enhancement Program) and has completed graduate training in Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and Brief Solution Focused Therapy. She also has completed Level's 1 and 2 of The Gottman Method (Dr. Gottman is the world's leading researcher in marriage therapy.) She has received also received training through the Approved Clinical Supervisor through ACT (Advanced Counselor Training).
Ronnie brings a refreshing, straightforward and sensitive approach to working with couples. She is known for her humor, her ability to work with intuitive energy, and occasionally (tee hee) her salty language.
Her life's goal and dream are to help #1millionmarriages 💕.
Local Attractions
Judith & Norman Alix Art Gallery
Stones N Bones
Wawanosh Wetlands
Canatara Beach and Park
Germain Park
The Lawrence House Centre for the Arts
Seaway Kiwanis Children’s Animal Farm
Starlight Casino
Hiawatha Horse Park and Driving Range
Live Music
NightLife
Refined Fool Brewing Company - Little Fool
Refined Fool Brewing Company - Big Fool
Two Amigos
Twisted Arm
Paddy Flaherty’s
Only the two of you will be present. This retreat is specifically crafted around the hurts/resentments/issues that are causing the two of you conflict, that needs to be healed and resolved.
The retreat takes place over the weekend at 144 Christina Street South, in Sarnia Ontario. No one will be in the clinic except the three of us which ensures complete privacy and confidentiality.
No, the price strictly covers the psychotherapy services received. As such, there is no HST, and depending on your insurance provider, you may be entitled to receive full reimbursement of the cost of the retreat.
Absolutely! In our intake emails, we will send you a list of all our local reputable places with links to their websites.
Ronnie will go over a 2-day itinerary or a 3-day itinerary with you in the Free consult. Typically, each weekend begins with an individual session with each partner, so Ronnie can gain a clear understanding and assessment of the issues that are hurting the relationship. Together, we craft the goals of what needs to be healed, resolved, or forgiven for both partners. No goals are made without an agreement from both partners. The rest of the weekend is determined by the goals that are created. However, some of the communication skills that are taught can be found here.
2 days are great when a couple struggles with communication and has some issues that require resolving. When the couple strictly wishes to focus on only communication, then two days typically is enough.
3 days, incorporates everything we do in a two day, but incorporates topics such as play, pleasure, intimacy, and building on more love, than just strictly communication. However, we can also do a hybrid two day depending on what your needs are.F
our days would only be necessary for a couple who has extensive complex issues and needs extended time to work through them. Again, speak with Ronnie about what would work for you the best.
The cost and benefit to doing an intensive is that it’s easier to stay in an uncomfortable conversation for longer periods so that you can finally resolve the issue. Most couples cannot do this because they either explode or withdraw. In other words, they fight, or flight. They do not face. Learning how to face the problem is a skill set. It is a skill set we will practice repeatedly throughout the weekend so that tolerance and resilience is developed, and the couple learns to use both love and respect to resolve the issues that are plaguing them.
Each person has free will. When both partners come to the intensive because they both want their marriage to work (despite how much they may have hurt each other in the past,) and have a willingness to acknowledge the pain they have caused the person (regardless of intent,) and a willingness to create a new relationship based on a new way of talking… than they can heal, and create a new path and a new future together.
All relationships have some form of conflict or pain. There is no such thing as a “perfect” relationship. But if we agree to learn how to face our problems together and have a willingness to change our behaviour and repair mistakes, then our relationship survives, grows, and even flourishes. If you both want it to work, then amazing things can happen. But we have to practice sitting in uncomfortable conversations to get there.
I think this is a very common fear. The purpose of the weekend is the exact opposite. The purpose is to learn a new way of discussing problems. We will be incorporating new skills like hitting the pause button, learning how to repair, and employing the four boundaries:
I am allowed to say No.
I am allowed to disagree.
I am allowed to give a complaint.
I am allowed to draw a boundary.
Further, Ronnie has worked with thousands of couples, and there will be plenty of opportunities to hit pause, to learn how to self-regulate when you have been hurt, or hit a trigger, and learn how to unhook from this feeling and state, so that you can resolve the conversation. No one is forced to do anything, or say anything, that they don’t want to. It’s about learning how to have both empathy and respect for your partner’s pain, even when you don’t agree with it.
In your Free 30 Minute Consultation, you can discuss your schedule with Ronnie to choose a date that best works for you all of you. Typically, Ronnie will hold two retreats a month but can be flexible on which weekend the couple chooses. Please discuss this with her further.
The 2-day retreat is 3600.00 and takes place on a Saturday and Sunday of your choosing. The 3-day retreat is 5100.00 and would take place on a Friday, Saturday, Sunday or alternatively, a Saturday, Sunday, Monday depending on availability.
Once you have had your consultation, and it feels like a good fit, then after filling out your intake forms, The Couples Clinic will take a 25% deposit to hold the date.
Your deposit would be refunded minus a 250.00 admin fee if made 14 days before the reservation. If the cancellation is made afterwards, then 50% of the deposit will be refunded.
Yes, to both. If you have health benefits, then your retreat may be partially covered, or entirely covered depending on your insurance provider. Give us a call at The Couples Clinic 519-541-9173, to discuss further how we can help you to access this information. However, even if you could not access health benefits, psychotherapy is a regulated health service in Ontario and can be counted as a health expense when filing your taxes.
Couple-Specific Intensive Retreats are not an appropriate fit for couples who are dealing with the following issues:
- Active substance abuse issues.
- Infidelity that has occurred in the last six months.
- History of physical abuse or where there is actively “hands on” between the couple.
- Individuals who struggle with explosive rage.
- Individuals who currently have criminal charges.
- Individuals who are no longer in love with their partner.
